but when fall comes around, i am one unthinkably happy girl. in summer, i like the sunshine and country music and random adventures (summer tends to hold many of those).
Ishare carli windows#
in spring, i live for dresses and flowers and driving with my windows down. in winter, i love bundling up in warmth and counting dow the days until Christmas and watching snow fall. i've always had a hard time picking a favorite season, though. Love mercy, live justly, walk humbly.take me there. My failure is the best motivation i could have to be able to drive into my dreams. any road is worth it as long as you have a good soundtrack. roads are dangerous and unpredictable, but that's what makes them worth driving on. they're always there to take us wherever we feel like going.
does that ever cross your mind? it makes no sense but is completely true at the same time. at the same time, i can be driving 70 miles per hour and feel like the world is completely still. i like being on a road, with or without a destination, because i'm moving towards something and away from something else. for about one day i was even convinced that i should be a truck driver. i think that my love for hotwheels as a kid is partly responsible for my love for driving now that i'm an adult. not a day went by when i did not have that container completely empty, cars scattered everywhere, my imagination designing stories about destinations and journeys of all of these vehicles. i found my case of cars last night, sitting on one of the tallest shelves downstairs. i'm the only one to ever do that? figures. I was one of those little girls who played with hotwheels and barbies simultaneously. and my pandora station kept playing all of the right songs. so as i sifted through all of my old, dirty junk, my anger towards my previous/current failure began to fade. most everything is attached to a memory, though. i opened each bin and container, condensing items to smaller boxes, sorting through old things and selecting stuff that might be put to better use in a homeless shelter or donation center. When i got home yesterday evening, i had this pressing urgency to tackle the much needed task of reorganizing everything in storage down stairs. i'm not sure why that phrase even exists. if that's not fuel for a new beginning, i'm not sure what is.Īctually, every beginning is new. Sometimes when you deliberately don't change something about yourself that needs to be dealt with and buried forever, you are no longer the only one who has to sustain the burden of consequence. i let someone down again i allowed my mistakes to literally be the expense of someone who has only given me the entire universe. while at the pool, i got yet another phone call drenched with disappointment and failure. after dropping gwen off at home and talking with her mother for a few quick moments, i drove home listening to music at deafening volume levels. perhaps this is just my opinion, but i sat in the sun reading a great novel therefore, the extent of my complaining is complete. in case you aren't getting my point, six hours is a disgustingly long time to be in a chlorinated body of water. Yesterday i spent six hours at the pool with gwen, a nine year old girl who i've been nannying this summer. Your blood has made them whole a permanent investment.Īll of those pieces of your broken heart that are scattered among people that you love and have loved are simply and beautifully your accomplishments. It remains, continuously pumping through each of their organs, keeping them alive.īlood isn't exactly something that can be "borrowed." This foreign blood replaces what their body cannot create for itself. if the blood matches, it must been given to whoever needs it. When someone's body is going through a traumatic situation and loses blood, a donor's blood is urgently given to them. something that makes someone more complete can't exactly be taken back once they've decided that you're not who they want anymore. real love builds up and forms goodness within us.
They own that piece prior to heartbreak and after the heartbreak.Īt some point in time, that piece of you made them a little more whole. When we love another person-a friend, a brother, a lover-we give them something from our heart and soul. No matter the size of that piece, i don't think that it is ever our own anymore.
Heartbreak is a decision that someone makes that causes one to abandon a portion of who we are forever. I think heartbreak is very far from being limited to romantic love. I think it could be a fact to say that every contact with another person affects both you and them in some way it influences the world for an instant and that impact remains.